Divorce is not easy for any member of the family, even if the parents resolve to be amicable and cooperative. It is always challenging to experience changes in routine and daily life, and the news that their parents are ending their marriage can be devastating for kids. It’s critical to initiate the initial conversation about divorce carefully and thoughtfully.
Parents who are ready to talk to their kids about the situation would be wise to prepare for this conversation. With intention, it is possible to navigate this initial talk in a way that allows the kids to effectively process what is happening without minimizing their feelings and concerns. If you are ready to move forward, you and your spouse need to prepare together for the initial discussion.
Before you talk
Before you have this conversation, you need to be certain that you are ready to divorce. This is a major step, and you should only tell your kids when it is definite you will be moving forward with it. Once you are certain of your decision and decide it’s the right time to have the talk, you and your spouse will make it easier for your children if you can present a united front. This sense of unity can help console your kids while they are hearing difficult news.
If you can, have some information ready to provide if the kids want it. For example, know your plan for which parent is moving out or how the two of you will share custody until the divorce is final. Having plans in place already can be comforting for the kids.
During the conversation
It is important to understand that your kids may react with confusion, anger or sadness. This is normal. Instead of minimizing their feelings or telling them to feel a certain way, allow them to express themselves. Let them ask questions and provide as many age-appropriate answers as you can. Prepare them for what to expect from the divorce process and after the process is final.
A solid foundation
The way you approach a Colorado divorce with your kids can lay the foundation for how they handle the entire divorce. It is helpful to prepare for this discussion and seek custody terms that will be beneficial for your kids and protect their well-being above all else.