Most people associate the holiday season with happiness, family, friends and memories. For some, though, the holidays are very stressful, and this can put some rocky marriages over the edge. Should you make your move towards divorce during the holidays?
A recent study found that one in 12 Americans are considering separating or divorcing at some point during the holiday season. For women, that number was even higher – one in eight. One expert weighs in with tips for those who might be contemplating separating or asking for a divorce during what is normally a happy time of the year.
First, it’s important to remember that emotions often rule our actions. Because the holidays are usually filled with stress, emotions can sometimes play a larger role now than at other times of the year. Before you make a decision about your marriage and divorce, take the time to think it through.
Second, it’s best to wait if possible. For some, waiting isn’t an option, especially if they are in a volatile relationship. However, if that is not the case and there are children involved, separating during the holidays can really have a deeper impact on them than waiting until after the first of the year. Asking for or beginning the process of getting a divorce may relieve a bit of the stress, but the reality is that a divorce can take weeks or months to become final. It’s not something that is going to happen within just a few days.
Third, remember that asking for a divorce will be something you will likely remember for a long time. You could end up resenting your divorce and the holidays together for years to come. For most people, that not an association they really want.
Finally, divorce often triggers feelings of guilt. This is frequently the case when people realize that a divorce is truly what they want. However, don’t let the holiday season compound your feelings of guilt. Find a way to accept how you feel and move forward – even if it means asking for a divorce now.
Divorce and separation is difficult. You have to ensure that rights and interests are protected, no matter what time of year it may be. An experienced family law attorney can help make this life-altering transition easier.
Source: Huffington Post, “5 Things to Know Before Asking for a Divorce During the Holidays” Michelle Crosby, Dec. 15, 2013