For some divorcing Colorado couples, the thought of spending more time with each other than is necessary may be daunting. For others, however, a divorce may simply be a speed bump on the long road of continued partnership.
A new trend has emerged on the celebrity divorce scene, and Coloradoans are taking part. Ex-spouses are vacationing together with their children. Everyone from Bruce Willis to Arianna Huffington has done it, including a former couple from Fort Collins, Colorado.
The 39-year-old Fort Collins man says that vacationing with his former wife is easy to do because they get along well even though they aren't together any more. After six years of marriage, the two divorced in 2006 and have gone on multiple vacations together with their children, including one trip to Disneyland.
The Colorado man claims that vacationing together can actually be more relaxing than vacationing alone with the children, saying it's easier on the parents when there are two of them to split responsibilities. He adds that the adult conversation can be a nice change of pace from talking only with the kids. He also thinks it's good for his children to continue having family experiences. Despite some fun vacations, however, the Fort Collins man says that the trips are only successful when neither he nor his ex-wife is in a serious relationship.
A Beverly Hills psychologist supports the idea of such congenial vacations but offers a few words of caution as well. She says that sometimes children who see their divorced parents spending time together and enjoying themselves might start believing that their parents will get back together. To avoid this, she says it's important to emphasize to children that these vacations are based around a special event, such as a birthday, for which both parents wanted to be present.
If you're considering going on a joint vacation with your ex and kids, another expert offers a few tips that may be helpful. She suggests that each parent spend some time with the kids separately during the trip. She also says that talking with your ex before the trip to lay down a few ground rules about things like how much money to spend and sleeping arrangements can go a long way to make sure everyone is on the same page.
Source: USA Today: "Divorce-cations? Split couples travel together for the kids," Karen Schwartz, 19 March 2011